Welcome to my Valentines special, where I want to focus on how finding true love can be a huge benefit to you. Impacting successfully on your personal, career and professional life.
What are you looking for in the ideal love of your life? Is it someone…
- to share experiences with?
- who loves you through thick and thin, warts and all?
- to care, nurture and cherish you?
- to learn from?
- loves you young, old, through ill health unconditionally?
- won’t swap you for a younger/ richer/ more attractive model?
- who is always there for you?
- whom you respect and they respect you ?
So where are you going to find this fantastic love of your life? RIGHT HERE…..RIGHT NOW…It’s you!
Have a love affair with yourself
Some people have difficulty with this simple concept. You might like to see it as having a deep appreciation of yourself if that’s the case.
Twenty years ago now, when I had hit rock bottom, work was incredibly stressful and my relationship with my husband had reached crisis point, an inspiring therapist said to me in her wonderful matter of fact way, “Darling, go and have a love affair… with yourself”.
Well you can imagine my astonishment!
And that’s exactly what I did, I sang out loud, love songs to myself on my way to and from work and I…
- learned to be comfortable and accept my body.
- gave myself nurturing, reaffirming positive self-talk.
- changed my wardrobe and treated myself like you would someone you have fallen in love with.
…and miraculously it worked!
Simply because what you say and how you behave is what comes back to you, reinforcing your patterns of behaviour good or bad.
The benefits of loving and appreciating yourself:
- Whatever life throws at you, you can totally rely on yourself to always be there through the good and bad times.
- Relax and feel safer – to try things out.
- You are never alone.
- Enjoy respect and unconditional love for yourself.
- You can trust yourself.
You have a Choice
The more you respect and love yourself, the less destructive impact others have over you. You become much stronger, more resilient, braver with greater confidence.
You begin to recognise that if someone is causing you pain it is, also because they are already hurting, and in conflict with themselves and those around them. They definitely are not in love themselves either.
You can choose to continue to be treated badly, cruelly and disrespectfully or you can choose to decide that you deserve more love, honour and respect. The starting place is with you.
Way back in my corporate days, I had an authoritative boss, who would constantly criticise me on the style of my management, what I was wearing, and the standard of my work.
At the time it was affecting my performance, my confidence and my sleep. When we had a meeting my stomach and spirits sank and I dreaded those meetings.
Once I came to realise that I had a choice, everything changed. Instead of coming from a place of feeling lack, worthless, a victim, I learnt that I am okay and that I love and respect myself and felt more powerful and confident.
By becoming stronger I saw the situation for what it was. It was her stuff, reflecting on me. I made a conscious effort and applying hypnosis and NLP techniques I turned the situation around. I visualised appreciative mental images towards her, wishing her happiness, success and fulfilment.
Within weeks our relationship had turned around, she started to recognise me for who I was, asking for my advice and opinions. It turned out that she had a number of personal problems going on at the time.
Take Control
Part of my satisfaction as a Mindset Coach is working with clients who experience a feeling of lack in their personal and business lives. With just a few sessions clients start to revaluate themselves, instead of seeing themselves as a victim where things are done to them. They take on board that they have the basic rights to respect, love and appreciate who they are for all their unique qualities. From that point on they begin to take control of their lives. Click here to find out more about my consultations.
You are Your Product
Well this is all very well you may be thinking but how does this relate to my professional life? Because quite simply what you give out comes back to you. Therefore the more you respect yourself…the more respect you will give to other people. Because you won’t be fearful of competition, being trodden on, and what others think about you. You will also develop more emotional intelligence and self-awareness.
Would you agree that the most important selling point of your business and career is you.You can spend hundreds of pounds on marketing and sales, but the bottom line is you are your product…how you feel about yourself is what is reflected out to your associates and potential customers.
So what are you waiting for respect, love and appreciate who you are for all your unique qualities, learn to let go of your faults and past mistakes and see them as part of your learning about yourself.
‘The heart is like a garden. It can grow compassion or fear, resentment or love. Which seeds will you plant there?’ – The Buddha
This really resonates with me right now, thank you Nicola, as always, I enjoy reading <3